Your boss - the boss you really like - is being fired.
“How is this fair?” you want to ask.
But the decision has been made. You’re only hearing about it retroactively. What are you going to do now?
The sudden departure of a beloved leader can leave you feeling shocked, confused, and even betrayed. It's a challenging situation that can shake your faith in your organization. Without a satisfying explanation, you might find your job satisfaction plummeting. You may even want to quit on the spot.
Change of any kind is hard; changes in relationships are especially hard. As you navigate through these turbulent waters, here are some key thoughts to consider:
Allow Yourself to Feel
It’s natural to experience a range of emotions: sadness, anger, anxiety, or disappointment. Acknowledge these feelings rather than suppressing them. We spend a very large amount of our time each week at work; the relationships we form in partnership with others are special. Your boss may have protected you, supported you, and developed you; you may have wonderful memories laughing alongside and accomplishing goals with your boss. It's not only okay, but very appropriate to grieve the loss of a leader you admired and trusted.
Feel what you feel without judgement. The more you try to force yourself to feel what you “should” feel and the more you try to “fix” your feelings, the more intense your feelings will likely become. Simply allow yourself to be, and your feelings will likely right themselves on their own with time.
INITIALLY, LEAN INTO YOUR LACK OF KNOWLEDGE
Until you learn the specific reason behind why your leader was fired, try to brainstorm a number of potential explanations and lean into your lack of knowledge, rather than trying to deduce what happened. For example, the issue may have been due to (1) underperformance, (2) budget cuts, (3) interpersonal differences within the leadership team that you did not get a chance to see, (4) repeated mistakes, (5) poor role fit, etc. Until you can learn more, challenge yourself to come up with as many potential reasons as possible. Keep an open mind and avoid “taking sides”.
Seek Understanding; AVOID Rumors
That being said, you are of course well within your rights to try to learn what happened! Understanding the broader context can help you process the change more effectively.
When and if possible, seek out both sides of the story in a professional manner straight from direct sources: your boss and your company’s HR team. You may want to phrase your curiosity as, “Learning the reasoning for this decision is going to help me to come to peace and recover faster.” As you listen, use Emotional Intelligence to cut through the emotions and discern what is true. You may find that there is fault on both sides, or you may find that neither party was explicitly in the wrong.
At the same time, avoid office gossip, speculation, and rumors; you may even need to remove yourself from some unhelpful conversations in order to keep your mind clear.
Maintain ProfessionalISM
Despite your personal feelings, it's crucial to maintain a professional demeanor. Continue to perform your duties to the best of your ability. Acting recklessly and burning bridges is only likely to harm, not help, your future, whether you decide to stay or whether you decide to go.
Connect with OTHERS
You're likely not alone in your feelings. Reach out to trusted coworkers to share your thoughts and concerns. Doing so can provide you with emotional support and help you to potentially gain different perspectives on the situation.
If those on your team are too strongly affected by the change, going to them may be unwise. Instead, seek solace in an objective professional mentor (e.g. someone outside of your company) or a team development coach - someone who is removed enough from the situation to be a calm, stable, and empathetic source of encouragement to you.
Focus on What You Can Control
While you can't change the decision that was made, you can control your response to it. Channel your energy into your work, personal development, and/or initiatives that can positively impact your team or department.
One of the best ways to honor your leader is to imitate their strengths. Think about what made them such a valuable member of your team and emulate them.
Remember also that you can still be friends with your boss outside of work. Give it a month to a quarter so that feelings are not too raw - but then feel free to get coffee with your old boss and share with them how grateful you are for their impact during their time with you. Stay connected and offer to share networks and future opportunities with each other.
Give the New Leadership a Chance
If you decide to stay in your current role, you will likely gain a new boss. Try to approach your new leadership with an open mind. They may bring fresh ideas and opportunities that could benefit you and the organization.
Reflect on Your Role and Future
Use this time to reflect on your own position within the company. Consider:
How does this change impact your role?
Do you still align with the company's vision and values?
What opportunities might arise from this transition?
If, after careful consideration, you feel that the company no longer aligns with your values or career goals, it's okay to explore other opportunities. However, avoid making hasty decisions based purely on emotion.
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Remember, change, while often uncomfortable, can lead to growth and new possibilities. By approaching this situation thoughtfully and proactively, you can navigate this challenging time and emerge stronger, both personally and professionally.